05 Dec Lonely…Maybe I should date for the fun of it

Been feeling so lonely lately.
One minute I’m okay;the next,not so much. I have a lot of things happening in my life right now that I’ll love to share with someone and I know my friends are there for me but I feel the need for more;I need a romantic partner to share with…💘 My romantic partner is usually my bestfriend and I tell every thing to😂 but since Gold is single,we have to deal with these difficulties at least twice a week,’single’troubles I mean.

I’ve had this lonely feeling on and off for a couple weeks,it has made me withdraw from certain people…I guess its safe to say that I have become a little bit closed off in letting people know and see who I am and honestly this is one of the things I feared deeply about Adulthood/Growing up. One gets so used to pain and change that you evolve even more than you had hoped.

I feel lonely. I feel a little sad. I feel a lot misunderstood. I feel happy. I feel angry and the need to cry. I want someone to see me;the real me. I want consistency and patience. I want to share my days with someone as it goes without feeling judged. I just want this space I feel to be filled up by something meaningful and I’m guessing its at this point you’ll think ‘how about you love yourself first?’. No!,how about I get into a relationship for the fun of it(A quick fix? I know).

Oh well,self love/sufficiency I would say has brought me to this point but maybe I need to do more. I just fear that I may love myself way too good that I’ll forget to let someone do so.

Remember I said this loneliness is as a result of lack of any romantic relationship in my life right now,well I truly hope that those of you in relationships aren’t feeling this lonely cause that would be terrible. I understand that individually people experience ‘healthy loneliness’ I would say but I feel your partner/relationship should be your safe haven which ultimately is the purpose of this writeup. Having said that,I thought to let you guys know where I’m at emotionally right now-so I am stuck at the happy and lonely juncture(its almost a perfect combination). I just really hope you’re doing much better than I am. I truly wish you the best and thank you for reading,much love.😎