Feelings Journal-I recorded how I felt everyday.

8th March

In a day I experience a whole ton of emotions,so I have decided to record just how I feel and possibly explain why.

Right now,I’m in a bus going to work and I feel sad and disappionted. One of my friends told me last night that ‘I do not have the fire to be a go getter’. I feel so trashy about myself right now,its been weighing down on me because a part of me agrees with him. I know I could be doing better but I find myself stuck and most of it is because of lack of finance(that’s an excuse right?,Yes that’s why a part of me agrees with him).
I keep excusing myself. So I am sad,disappionted,ashamed and angry at myself.

14th March

I forgot to update for a little minute but not so much has been missed when it comes to my feelings. However,yesterday took a little different turn from others…I was motivated,thanks to one of my friends. You know how the love of your life may be staring you down in your face but you never recognise it or maybe pass it on as ‘friendly’ and then one day it hits you. Yes I had that sort of moment yesterday,but wasn’t in my love life but career/money wise😊 and like I said thanks to one of my friends.
I have been in deep thoughts with myself about side hustles I should dive into,whilst also being patient with myself because usually we are the only pressure givers of our own. So I took notes of several skills/attributes that I usually have/do for people for free but never acknowledge as anything and now I would develop them in order to earn. I was so happy yesterday and still am.
Oh lest I forget,I am taking some online courses on Content,Marketing,etc and I took the Content Marketing exam today…I PASSED!!!! Yaassss💃💃
I want to celebrate. I am proud of myself😊. You know now that I think about it,the last time I logged my feelings on here(the first paragraph),the same friend that said something that made me feel down is the same one that pointed out what I’m good at. I guess tough love right?,either way I’m liking it at this point.

9th April
I’ve got to be honest,I forgot I had started writing this hence the loop in daily/weekly records. Today however is a good day.
I am putting on a wig I normally wouldn’t wear,it is 6:16am and I am on my way to work. Going to work now has been my life this past month and no I wasn’t unemployed before😂just worked remotely. I remember telling someone last night that I am well adjusted to going to work now as opposed to how I was feeling and the protest I had within myself and environment. Maybe I’m not adjusted fully but I feel like saying it just makes it true.

So,how do I feel today?
Honestly,I am not sure but I feel a bit of gratitude. I am thanful for everything I have,had and about to gain. Been experiencing a thousand and one emotions recently(what’s new about this,I mean Gold when are you never?🤔)However,I think its a lot more different this time. I am in such a great space in my mind,haven’t figured it all out but if I learnt something last year it is not to take on everything all at once. So its been one day at a time,one task at a time,just so I don’t get overwhelmed or overlook the whole purpose of starting a project in the first place. Okay maybe I wasn’t sure on how I felt in the beginning of this post but its clear to me now- I am hopeful.

I am looking forward to tomorrow because its going to be better. Remember my theme of the year? ‘Living Intentional, in the case you missed it,here’s the link- Happy New Year…Let’s Talk Well I have been sticking to that(said theme)with the help of my vison board and the amazing friends that I have.

Okay.
So how are you?
What have your life been like?
Can you believe we’re in April already??!
Yo!!!😂this isn’t a new year anymore,a whole OG. So please my Darling,do not dull yourself. Get Up and get that dream,get that money.

See you at the top.
Much love always.

Gold Gerry